Moments that make work fun

1. Chey, my old manager.

Her first day at our store me and her and in the storeroom sorting through boxes.

i bend over to grab a box when my colon dialted 2 cms and let out a roar.

She quickly looks up like a scared meerkat.

She sniffs in once and looks at me with a look of disgust.

Her:Was that you?!?!?
Me:no.....maybe...yes

2.Random lady

I was working on my underwear table when a troubled customer asks me:

"excuse me, where do you keep the boys underwear"

I looked directly behind her, exactly where the under is located, which she sees.

She then proceeds to ask me:

"do you sell boys thongs?"

The first thing i wanted to say was" you mean the ones on the feet" but then i proceeded to say" no"

3.Random knicker lady

A crazy bitch walks in with her two ginger sons to get some underwear.

The traditional name for youngs boys underwear is "jocks".

The youngest weasley refused to pick any and she yells" PICK SOME KNICKERS OR DONT GET ANY!!!"

Poor little weasley continued to scream and cry. She then started to countdown so the entire store could hear her"29,28,27,26....ECT".

I expected when she reached zero her heard would inplode and a dragon would escape from her and out of the window.

Poor little weasley...its ok i dont want to wear knickers either.

4.As i Just walked out the toilet jelena then asked me straight away

"Hey scott is yours clean"

i immediatly thought the worse and asked her "My penis?!?!"

She was shocked...then told me she ment my department

Good use of a metaphor

This is a Termonoligy commonly used in the world, broken down to a possibilty by Myself and Mr Stephen.

We all know about the "Bases " when it comes to Relationships/Females.

1st-kiss

2nd- grab/grope/dry humping

3rd-B.J/H.J/ Vaginal Touchage

4th- sex

5th-anal or bondage....but thats a completly different story, lets keep up with the basics

So there are 4 bases on the sexual term

A sport that useually has 4 bases is...

BASEBALL!!

Now in Baseball we have the following:
The Pitcher
The Batsman
The Catchers
The Ref

Now we have decifered these and they also mean:
The Pitcher-The girl/guy you are pursuing)
The Batsman-You, the pursuer)
The Catchers-The Ones who are trying to get you out of the game so you dont have a chance to get to a higher base)
The Ref-A good friend who is trying to make sure the catchers dont play dirty

So the objective of the "love game" is top successfully Hit the ball.
Now the Pitcher(Love interest)Pitching the ball means they either Flirt or indicate they would like to be with you.
This is when the batsman has to hit the ball.

Sometimes,when the interest is only flirting and THATS IT...This is call a curve ball
Meaning that it looks like it is happening, but there is no point trying to hit it , Cause you will never hit it.

Some batsman are proffesinal and have hit the ball Many Many times, while some are still hesitant to hit it.

Once the ball is hit and in there air...
THE GAME IS ON!!

At this point the Batsman has to decide what rate he wants to run to the bases.
If he runs too quickly, there is a chance he could trip and lose the chance of even reaching that base.
The entire time the catchers are keeping there eye on the ball, waiting for the best moment to catch to get you out. Luckily this is when your red intervenes to stop any foul play.

The main fashion nowdays is to hit home runs, in one night.
I know a few guys who have hit home runs at parties and gatherings, but never really had time to enjoy the game, they just rushed into it.

Im more of a "slow and steady wins the race" Because in this case'it useally does.
I walk from base to base, sure ive always been caught out before third, but i take time to enjoy the walk from first to second, Smell the roses on the side of the field, And think how lucky i am to even have the privlidge of batting for a good pitcher.